KOur western world's entree brings us simple dogma, the intent of our lives is marriage, child/children and relation until death do us part.
And then a quilt and a good tombstone, funded by a widow (more often) or widower (more often).
The wedding itself is something special, something sacred. If individual doesn't believe, let them see how much time the average female is preparing for the wedding. A dress, hair, another dress, due to the fact that the first 1 doesn't fit, shoes, no, but another shoes, masks, nails... And this isn't even her own wedding!
The decision to go to a wedding means 3 days of work for her before, and there is inactive quite a few uncertainty as to whether appropriate decisions have been made.
Only that specified requirements: love for death, faithfulness to the grave are now involuntary sadism.
Most people don't get the least chance of that, or they'll conflict in failure.
The human dream of faithfulness is the penguin
MOmentek. I'm far distant to disavow the advantages of constant relationships.
The 2 of us are easier to get credit for the apartment, easier to deal with the offspring, there are many studies that show that long-term relationships, especially in men's cases, prolong life and make it better.
Success or happiness. What do you want?
People talk a lot about wanting monogamy. And then they do a lot to prove the opposite.
The symbol of faithfulness to humans was abruptly a penguin. After all, “The penguins fall in love only erstwhile in their lives and erstwhile they are connected, it is for life.”
And due to the fact that penguins betray themselves to power, relationships are frequently seasonal here, and the necrophile is unknown to them? Come on, let's not be specific.
A fewer years ago, large popularity on the network made the movie twisted by National Geographic. So far, I've been watching it with brain pain, due to the fact that it's the most brutal lesson of a relation you can get from the world.
Penguin's husband is going home to his wife and his children. She finds her lover. The gentlemen are starting to fight, the blood spills sideways. At any point, Mrs. Penguinova has to choose who she prefers. And chooses... a lover.
My husband is inactive fighting for his family. He throws himself at his rival, who hides with his female in his nest.
But he is beaten. He's making the last cry of despair. He stands defeated and humiliated.
Because that's what life is like. What about us?
We make mirages.
Ned we are told that the man after the birth of the child, at most will be number 2 in relation to the fact that these bonds – in most cases – will slow decision towards common indifference.
That tenderness will replace contempt, the emotional coldness of a husband or wife.
We are not told that most people who are now married or partnered are facing betrayal. And there are many.
Supposedly, all married individual theoretically understands that about 30 percent of our country's weddings are now ending in divorce.
More
More in town than in the country. Not that fields, forests, meadows, piglets and pterodactyls give love, fidelity and marital honesty. People are simply ashamed of what others say, which is why they divorce little often.
I wonder, though, how would it look if individual put us in a chair, took our pants off, and suggested, “We catch you by the balls and you have a 30% chance that it will hurt and you will be like Najman slapping the mat, so what, you decide?” most likely rather a large number of people would say that, however, not necessarily.
(By our way, since we like to compare so much, the Russians – 3rd place in the world, Belarusians – fifth, and Ukrainians – ninth, divorce much more frequently than Poles)
It's not said that we live besides long on monogamous relationships. Which, after respective years, seem boring and boring to people – most frequently break up marriages with an internship from 5 to 9 years.
In times before romanticist love, let’s say matrimony lasted about 15 years in the 18th century.
And it lasted so long, due to the fact that surviving in those days in the 1930s was an achievement.
At this point, the expected life expectancy of women in Poland was estimated at 79.6 years, and men at 71.6 years. And now you can wonder how you can pull someone's 40s or 50s, erstwhile even life in prison usually takes only 25?
Very much and very nicely talk about eternal love, about the power of faithfulness about the magic of trust, about the endless desire.
Because if you find the right person, it'll all work out, won't it?
Except in time, that love gets dirty. part by piece. It's like a erstwhile elegant dress, from which individual ripped their sleeves off, individual poured soup on it, and individual wiped their ass with it. And under all that crap, sludge and dirt, it's hard to see what was in there at first.
And you can tell a lot about how it can be repaired, how it can be washed. It's not usually possible. People yell at each another hard. “It’s your fault! It's yours! If you weren't so selfish! If you weren't like that, crap and shit!”
As time goes by, it's easier for individual in a relation to fuck up than to make them happy. Besides, you fight an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth here. due to the fact that if you do, I do! And who's to blame? I don't know. It's the nature of love.
And by the way, you gotta pretend before the planet that our relation is simply a success. due to the fact that dirt washes at home.
By praising faithfulness, condemning betrayals in others, demanding from close and distant friends who are in unhappy relationships, working on a relation (things were erstwhile fixed and thrown out today), we show astonishing knowing of our own faults.
In this area, we are all hypocrites.
WWe all know how it is.
An exemplary woman of the house, she puts herself in the bath in the evening, with her hand between her thighs and dreams as if it were with a handsome friend of her husband who smells so good and looks so chaotic (and would rip off these panties, and she would of course defy due to the fact that it would turn her on more).
Is it treason or not?
Meanwhile, my husband's handsome friend is sleeping with a friend in the department who he first had sex with on a business journey and now he wants to get free of her due to the fact that she's getting more involved.
This department mate has had a husband in a decade who has not noticed her and she is worried that she is getting older and that this is her last chance to build something new.
And my husband doesn't want to sleep with her.
In turn, her husband, the only pleasance in his life is watching porn. Half an hr of dialing, 3 minutes of jerking.
He confesses his sins diligently, and the priest in the confessional listens to him and is ashamed of his thoughts that he is very fond of the organist.
All of this is filled with ubiquitous frustration.
Access to another people is the easiest in history
WThe planet has made tremendous advancement over the last 2 decades in 1 area: communication.
I mean, fuck, war, exploitation goes on, but erstwhile it comes to contacting another people, we're closer than ever. This trend will proceed to make and deepen.
I mean, in order to see what America is – Christopher Columbus had to discover it (I skip how much it was first). You should have gone on the ship and sailed. Later, there were letters – distributed on horseback. There was a telegraph, then a STACIONAL telephone etc.
This exchange of information about others was far imperfect and very expensive.
Even our parents knew mostly people from work and from their city/town/village. The net has changed everything here.
Information, access to people is the easiest and cheapest in human history. And this trend will proceed to develop.
By affecting social ties.
Now always, always at any point, there can be a better option. Whenever we're angry, we can look for individual to make us feel better for a while.
This simple example, close to two/thirds of Tinder's users is in a constant relation (report in June "Cyberpsychology, Behavior, and Social Networking)".
Half of them aren't expected to date anyone. What is it, then? What's missing. It's about merit. Entertainment. The female wants to be seen again. Men want to feel the thrill again.
And now for us to realize each other.
A lot of us, especially after 20, 30 years of age, gotta prepare for this monogamy to be, but at best, serial, which means there will be a relation after the relationship.
That there will be periods of respective years of relationships intertwined with periods of loneliness
That a permanent relation won't do everything in movies and songs. That sometimes the compromise would be that she betrayed me 3 times and how am I expected to forgive her?
Is it worth it in specified a situation?
Of course it's worth it. But life is empty without love. And it's better to have her for a while than ever.
Finally, as John Lennon sang, "All you request is love". Which didn't halt him hitting his 2 wives.
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