Young people later start reasoning about starting a family. I realize that. I'm from the Z generation myself. Life gives us so much chance that "you will make a nest" frequently goes to the background. Doesn't mean we're not reasoning about it anymore. We do not stop, although according to the study "Advised Adulthood", which was published in 2022 by the Polish economical Institute, we do this later, due to the fact that after 30 years. Moreover, we do this regardless of sexual orientation, which is not included in statistic anymore.
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I'm gay, and I want to be a parent. I can't imagine another life
I'm a 27-year-old gay man from a large city, and in the future, I'd like to have kids to make a warm and safe home for. I can't imagine turning 40 and not having my own family. I'm looking at older homosexual colleagues in my community, and I know I don't want my life to look the same in a twelve years. any of them are in permanent relationships, but most of the time they have problem uncovering the right person. Many simply find it hard to think about a lasting relation erstwhile neither the law nor the social atmosphere give hope even of specified a fundamental thing as formalizing a relationship.
Instead, I feel that I will find fulfillment in raising a young man who needs to be cared for and loved. I have something inside me that instills in me the dream of my own family. The love my parents gave me. I know how a relation based on common respect should look. Mine support me in everything I do, and I know I can always number on them. I would like to give my kid the same love and trust. I want I could live his life like my dad does with me.
I remember a year ago erstwhile we sat in front of the tv to watch the premiere episode of "Time for the show. Drag me out". (Our common impressions were later described in Kultura Gazeta.pl in the text entitled "Father and boy in front of TV. We watched the first episode »Time for the show. Drag me out «"). Why am I mentioning this? due to the fact that not all kid in Poland can number on the openness and attention that I can always number on from my parents. After the launch of the program in online forums, I read many entries in which young net users complained about their parents' homophobia.
I'm young, I've just started paying taxes, and before me, I have quite a few learning about alleged adult life, but I don't request education in one. I know I'll be able to give a kid love, a sense of security, acceptance no substance what. You don't gotta tell me parenting isn't an easy task. I'm watching friends with my kids. I see their fatigue, their cares. However, I besides see how the same friend who had previously complained about fatherly hardships brings his daughter to work and looks at her with this large parental love, which forgives everything in a second.
The presence of this cute few-year-old in the editorial board made our day much nicer and happier. But I felt a sting of regret in my heart. I look at regular pains and joys with envy. Will I always experience them?
Not many people think about becoming a gay daddy. In pop culture, neither see nor hear
The biggest difficulty is uncovering in Poland a second homosexual or bisexual man who would besides like to start a family. I compose this from autopsy due to the fact that I've been dating and dating people for years, but most of them don't think about starting a family. Yes, most of them are not even ready to make a long-term relation that will be based on honesty and trust. I don't want to replicate the harmful stereotype of gays who mostly lead a organization lifestyle due to the fact that everyone has the right to live as they want.
But can 1 blame us for the fact that fewer of us are reasoning about a permanent relation erstwhile there are no legal and social prospects? If even a walk by the hand with a loved 1 could affect acts of aggression? I have the impression that in 1 of the most homophobic countries of the European Union, fleeting relationships are a much easier and safer way to live (according to this year's Rainbow ILGA-Europe Ranking "Rainbow Map & Index" our country has placed together with Bulgaria in the penultimate place in the European Union).
Can gay people in Poland become parents?Shutterstock/Mix Tape
The model of a single-sex family, which would be visible in pop culture or in mass media, practically does not exist. erstwhile we read about a homosexual household having children, it is usually a lesbian couple who rise a biological kid of 1 of them. In the context of non-heteronormative men, however, this is not mentioned at all. And if anything, only in a negative and hateful context.
"The creeping equality". For decades we have marched to the essential minimums
Although in the West the possession of offspring by single-sex couples does not rise as many utmost emotions as in Poland, this is inactive a subject that can be seen as taboo. But nothing will change unless we start talking loudly about the fact that each of us, regardless of sexual orientation and sex identity, has the right to establish a happy family.
And erstwhile will things change? The road to full equality in Poland is inactive winding and far away, as I say with unhidden sadness. Our government inactive does not let us to sanction a single-sex relation in any way. Last autumn, Minister of Equality Katarzyna Kotula announced the submission of the bill on registered partnerships. She even called it government, though later many coalition MPs began to contradict her words. According to the authoritative website, work on the task is underway, and the planned deadline for the adoption of the task by the Council of Ministers was planned for the second 4th of 2025, which is just coming to an end. This was besides confirmed by Minister Kotul herself, who at the end of April in a conversation with the Polish Press Agency reported that most of the ministry's comments had been agreed, but it is inactive unclear erstwhile the bill will hit the Council of Ministers.
The task is called a "necessary minimum" by coalition politicians, as it involves, among another things, joint taxation settlement, the right to social security, the right to organise the burial of a partner or the right to inherit. However, in terms of having children, the task is very conservative. It removed the evidence allowing the adoption of children by same-sex couples, due to the fact that politicians of the Polish People's Party, who besides formed a government coalition, disagreed with it.
But rainbow families already exist! Without this bill, however, they will inactive not be treated equally by the state. "This is simply a minimum that does not include, and should take into account the safety of families with children," said activist Maja ebony in the material for "Facts in the afternoon" TVN24. It besides does not make it possible for brave people from the community to arrive who decide to make a household with children.
Polarized society. To make a difference, we request to talk more about it. Still
A survey by the IBRiS conducted for "Rzeczpospolita" in July 2024 shows that the tiny majority of Poles (51.7%) support the introduction of the Act on Partnerships "the anticipation of interior adoption, i.e. regulating the situation of children who are raised in same-sex relationships – by establishing both people as guardians or guardians of the child".
So we are inactive in the conflict for parental equality. According to an IPSOS survey of June 2024, as many as 44 percent of Poles and Poles argue the right of single-sex couples to adopt children, and support them – 41 percent. This shows how much more needs to be done in the field of education in Poland, as no technological investigation has confirmed that the improvement of children by single-sex couples has a negative impact on their development.
Meanwhile, Poland lacks foster parents. There are over 15,000 children waiting for the fresh home. They won't find care in rainbow families, that's for sure. The disapproval of communicative is mainly conducted by the Church, right-wing organizations and politicians associated with them. The last presidential election showed that they had made their point. The president-elect opposes the extension of rights to the LGBT+ community, and during the presidential debate he simply stated that he is "open to conversation" about the position of the closest person, which is derogatory for all non-heteronormative people who would like to establish a average family.
Fate wants to play poker with us. 1 gives hope and 1 takes it
Karol Nawrocki's win truly buried our dreams of Poland becoming an open country for all minorities. Although the work in the ministries on the Law on Partnerships will continue, we can be certain that for years or even decades we will not see any change, which only a fewer weeks ago seemed rather real. We can besides forget about the amendment of the penal code introducing protection against discrimination on grounds of sexual orientation or the sex agreement law. With the approval of politicians, not only will we not get the rights we deserve, but those we have as people will not be respected. You can say I'm overreacting, but I know what our reality looks like.
For the next fewer years, I will be incapable to establish a household on equal terms. I'm not waiting anymore. proceed to crawl and start reasoning about yourself first. If I can't fulfill my life's desire, which for most of my peers is not impossible, then I will look for happiness in a place where the Catholic version of morality is not dominant. LGBT+ people in Poland were, are and will be – no policy will change that. But I only have 1 life and I want to be happy. Just like that.
